The Breakup That Breaks You
Finding acceptance, meaning and closure.
It feels borderline sadistic to say this out loud, but everyone should go through at least one heart-shattering breakup in their lifetime.
I’ll explain why in a second, but I do just want to acknowledge your presence here.
This is the first installment of my revamped newsletter, CLUB HEARTBREAK, and honestly, it means so much to me that you’re taking a moment to check it out. I feel like this is the part where I’m supposed to tell you that I take this responsibility seriously and that I won’t let you down, but honestly, f*ck it.
My intention with CLUB HEARTBREAK is simple, to give you more access to me. More of my head, more of my heart. A safe space for us to really explore what it f*cking means to be human; to love, to hurt, to feel and to explore. If you go VIP, you can message me/DM me anything you want.
I’m not really concerned whether or not you like it because I learned a long time ago to stop seeking validation from others. Honestly, that’s just one lesson I hope you learn from subscribing. Either way, if you don’t vibe with this energy, you can unsubscribe. I won’t take it personally.
On the other hand, maybe you’re one of the special ones, the dreamers, the deep feelers and deep thinkers; someone who is tired of the mindless algorithmic drip and just wants something a little bit more real. So if this is you, buckle up.
Now that that’s out of the way… ready to jump in?
So… about that breakup that broke you? Here’s what you need to know.
Don’t run from the pain, don’t hide from the discomfort. There’s something real and raw in the hurt and when you push yourself so hard to move on, to let go, and to find closure you lose the beauty that is suffering.
Let me explain.
Pain is the gap between where you are right now (your reality) and where you want to be (your desired state).
Your suffering is the feeling of being stuck between those two outcomes, not knowing how to make your “desired state” your reality, or worse, you don’t even believe it’s possible.
But that breakup that breaks you… that’s gonna teach you an important lesson. It’s going to teach you that no one is coming to save you. No matter what comes at you in this life, you’re going to have to make a choice, you’re going to have to choose yourself.
When you get to the point that you’re sick and tired of feeling sick and tired, there is absolutely nothing that can stand in your way, including getting your heart shattered into a thousand pieces.
I understand where you’re at right now. Feeling like you’ll never be able to move on, that you just blew your one chance at being happy. You think there is no way you can possibly move forward because everything about your future was planned around a life with them.
But you have a choice.
Do you allow this breakup to define you? Do you let it become who you are? Or does it awaken a part of you that needed to change? Does it create the space necessary to embrace a new identity?
You get to choose to move on. You get to allow yourself to have closure. You get to be brave, you get to be bold, you get to finally be someone new.
3 Non-Heartbreak Things I’m Thinking About
Kindness is severely underrated. I think it’s the number one thing I’d be looking for in a partner, if I was looking for anything in a partner (iykyk).
True freedom is being able to shed years of anxiety and stress from the expectations others have put onto you.
I have two dogs. One has four legs & Capital-T trauma, the other has 3 legs and is blissfully ignorant about everything, but the thing that brings me the most joy is when they both decide to do a #2 at the same time. Talk about a harmonious life.
& On a Personal Note
There’s going to be a lot of fun updates for y’all here but for now, just one.
Coming off the heels of my last Q&A I’ve decided to host a live MASTERCLASS on March 5th, at 6pm EST. I’m going to be focusing on the different types of heartbreak, and the specific ways to approach your healing.
Seats are open and available NOW so be sure to reserve your spot.
I’ll see you there!
